lessons

I recently had 2 unusual situations. Both involved people I did not know and had met both for the 1st time on the same day.

We all have a mutual friend who is one of the most loving, compassionate person I have ever met.

Both were weird and strange incidents where I felt like I collided head first into someone and then skidded off the boards with another. Both unsettling and kind of silently violent. Do you know what I mean? Like the air is charged with something unspoken that gets twisted up too soon and then no one can speak?

I found them both really odd due to meeting them on the same day and considering the nature of the mutual friend.. how things could derail so quickly. I kind of hoped for 2 new really cool and interesting friends..maybe still a possibility.. but wow did these 2 go on strange ride. 


The first, I found out- we both shared an interest in our mutual friend. I assumed they were also aware of the overly casual nature of the person. But I was wrong. Dead wrong. They took their relationship very seriously and when I met them and struck up a casual conversation about our mutual friend.. it caused an enormous amount of fury and rage to erupt. I was a lightning rod for a series of emails that lasted well into the early morning and then I was abruptly blocked and canceled from a shared online existence. What I learned: Sometimes, it's better to find other things in common than shared friends.

The 2nd, took a curious interest in my creative endeavors and invited me to partake in which they would be the subject. I thought it was an intriguing offer, but I admit I was skeptical as to the motivation. But I have had a history of being doubtful and suspicious of the interests of others and put it aside and accepted the offer. I realized.. I don't really enjoy having my subjects chosen for me. I would never be a good wedding photographer.. I'll say that right now. I like to take photos in a random and serendipitous way. So, I went, had dinner, felt odd and vaguely unsettled, thanked my host and left. What I find more unsettling is the product of that has been altogether ignored. So, I wonder if my skepticism was more on track than I gave it credit for. What I learned: to be up front about my abilities. I'm not a great people photographer. I know that.

What else I learned.. check your expectations at the door but keep your boundaries close to heart.

my tattoos.

not my photo..wp, originally uploaded by jilly71.

Well you know it doesn't always go as you think it will. I thought I'd be good and write everyday. Guess not. Oh well fuck it. It's been a good 46 days or so.. I have put a photo a day up on Facebook if you're there.. you can see them. Today I celebrated my rebellion by having a peppermint Aero bar. And then I crashed.

So what's been happening..

The Olympics started. You've probably been hearing about them. They were supposed to run the torch up my neighbourhood but 25000 protesters put a stop to that. It was really calm and peaceful despite news reports days later of hooliganisms.

I don't know about all of this Olympic hoopla.. some people say it's "great exposure for Vancouver" and all the jobs.. look at all the jobs that have been created.. and the developments and the free concerts and oh my..look at all the visitors bringing money to the city.. but it's the fundamentals.. the face that we celebrate someone dedicating the better part of their lives to sport. I mean, great. Don't get me wrong.. it's great to dedicate yourself to skating at rapid speeds in a giant oval..perfecting the art of hurling yourself at 140km/hr down an ice track with hair pin curves.. that's great too.. I guess I'd feel better about the same thing if we, as a society regularly celebrated the epic journeys of doctors who foregoe top end salaries to work in the worlds poorest and most neglected places. Or artists who've dedicated their lives to poetry and painting. You know what I mean? I just don't get excited for mogal skiing. Maybe a zip line down a mountain.. I might get excited for that. Or Olympic slam poetry.

Speaking of the arts.. Alexnader McQueen decided to check out early. I'm not a follower of fashiion.. but I did occasionally check out what he was up to.. the renegade bad boy of the London fashion scene.. famous for making the skull contemporary. His shows were excess and extravagant and never held inside the coloring book lines. And then he would just make some exceptionally beautiful things..like this..

 Or this dress... I love it. I think it's 3000GBP

 

It's a shame.. people says it's always the most brilliant that are the most tortured and I think that's a crass thing to say.. as though you can't be brilliant unless you're tortured. The really brilliant thing is to learn how to harness the lightning rod creative spark and keep it alive. McQueen was incredibly creative.. but he blew his spark out. Boo. 

That's enough for today.. better leave something for tomorrow, eh..

Day 11, Month 2- 100 day thing

Sorry, I've been sick again. It's been raining. The world has been arriving all week. So have all the police and the military. Maybe you've heard about the little event in Vancouver?

I'll write again tomorrow, I promise.. the whole 100 days thing.. is flawed for someone with a short attention span. Really.. should be broken down into 3x 33 day blocks.

she was all alone with her thoughts.. just a guitar and the sun to keep her company.

IMGP0004, originally uploaded by jilly71.

me and Bill

me and Bill, originally uploaded by jilly71.

day 7- month 2- 100 day thing

Sunday. Another day of feeling lost.  Life is hard sometimes. Not necessaily for me. Life could get hard though if I lost my job and ran out of money. It would take a year to get hard, I think.

No, it's just that there's so much crap and complaining and bullshit and ego's dancing. Sometimes all I want to do is curl up in the sunshine with a friend. Sometimes the way when you were a kid and you could take a nap with your friend and that was that. Life being simple instead of complicated and weird.

Did I mention that I went to Edison, Wa yesterday? The last time I was there I got some lovely photos. This time.. not so much. But, I did talk a business into opening and then spent nearly all my american coin because they let me invade their holiday. A pretty vintage planter, some stamps that say PEACH and LEMON, a couple of indie CD's and a pretty floral scarf. I had lunch in a tiny tiny bakery that grew all their vegetables in the yard next door. Slow Food Bakery or something. It was yum. Edison is yum.

Tomorrow.. I'm going to give my thoughts on hamlets and T intersections.

hey girly wanna apple?

IMGP0018, originally uploaded by jilly71.


Pike Market, Seattle. Jan 2010

day 5, month 2- 100 day thing

It's Friday.

I have been demoralized by the scale.

It's nothing really, but when you drop from a Levi size 34 to 27 and the scale shows a difference of 8 lbs. Maybe I shouldn't be using a scle that weighs shipping pallets?

I discovered something else.. should know people better before trying to take their pictures. It doesn't work very well for me. But then again.. I don't really take pictures of people very often. I should work on that.

Random quote from my favorite book that fits:

"She did not plan; she merely let herself go, and the overwhelming life in her did the rest. It is only when youth is gone and experience has given us a sort of cheap courage that most of us realize how simple things are."

Tha Crack Up- F. Scott Fitzgerald, pg 149

Day 4, Month 2- 100 day thing

The Olympics are coming. Any day now. Roads are being blocked off. There are suspiciously more cyclists on the roads. There are also alot more police. Weird buildings and tents are popping up and the Canada Flag is everywhere that you almost would think its Canada Day.

One great thing is they're making it really inconvenient to drive or park a car. Maybe they won't change back and roads will stay blocked and then eventually the concrete will crack and tiny flowers will grow. Then moss will take over and the wildlife will come back. 

It's going to be a strange month.

Day 3- Month 2- 100 day thing

A bomb went off in my personal life last night. Nothing too too traumatic. Actually, it had nothing to do with me. It was like I was sitting in a cafe and and the waitress blew up after she took my order. Figuratively people. Figuratively.It's not for public consumption.. just when you blog everyday I'll just vaguely explain the daily events. Tomorrow.. maybe it will be a poem.

I did a lovely thing for a friend of mine. They didn't know it was coming, but I got the hint they really like something of mine and then I made it happen for them. I think the world of them and I hope I put a spring in their step and a glide in their stride.

Patti Smiths' book 'Just Kids" is an exceptional read. I highly recommend it. 

Dairy, Sugar, flours- check
Other issue- 1 minute?

day 2- 100 day thing

Frack. Frick. I keep skipping days. I think I ate flour yesterday too.

Wow. Vancouver is changing with this Olympic Hoo Ha. Last night there were giant moombeams shot in to the sky off the Burrard Inlet. I can only imagine it's some kind of pagan offering to the athletic gods. Roads are closing, streets are blocked off and suspiciously every bus station shelter billboard is promoting the health benefits of Coke and McDonalds.. the top corporate sponsors.

I went out to catch some live music yesterday at a new funny little place called Corderoy. Food was good. Open mike was better. Maybe I'll be back.

day 1- month 2- 100 days

I cant count the days unless I go by the dates. So back to 1. Besides it's like another clean slate. It's business time now folks. We're in 57 day countdown. It's game on.

Lets see.. what's happened... I drove to Seattle and stayed in a fancy hotel and met fancy people and had a pretty fancy time. Some of it was pretty interesting and all I can say is I had one hell of a good time and then shut the door. I bought a jack on a necklace which has made a crap load of sense to me but oddly, not to very many other people. Which I find odd.

I drove home. Then I rented another car and drove to Chilliwack and put myself up in a old hotel with a clawfoot tub that punished me with a lack of hot water. How could you do that? I wandered around Chilliwack aimlessly spending money and treating myself to anti tomboy regimes of manicures and eyebrow shaping regimes. I even wandered into a makeup counter.

Then I got all dolled up and ran late to see my dear friend Bill play with his band Bop Ensemble, which was simply amazing. This girl playing bass... sang like listening to Rickie Lee Jones ala 'Chuck E's in Love' ..But it almost wasn't meant to be.. when I arrived.. all the doors were locked. I thought I was going to burst into tears. But oddly.. the last door in the back was unlocked and I walked in the backstage area.. past the belongings and CD's and was kind of alarmed at all that but so relived I was in the building. I waited with my heart thumping wondering if I could open the door and flood the theatre with light.. I snuck in like a feather of sun and I managed to get to a seat and let Bop fill my ears and heart with bliss. I missed seeing my old friend sing and play and I fell in heart with the band.. so sweet.

I shot this little video of him teaching me to clap flamenco the next morning..on my IPOD! I know.. shut the front door!

Then we said our sad goodbyes and went our separate ways again. I heart Bill.

what day is it today

I'm getting bored of blogging everyday.

I went to Chilliwack to see a friend play over the weekend. I'm heavy in heart and have a headache.

That's all I can write today.

Jill

Day 29- 100 day challenge

IMGP0052, originally uploaded by jilly71.

Drat I missed another day. I'm not very good at these 100 day challenges. Oh vell. I'm 1/4 of the way through now.

I went to Tacoma while I was in Seattle so I could visit the museum of glass. This is the bridge of glass made of alot of Chihuly's work.

Day 27- 100 day challenge

Home from Seattle.. many a random befriending.. many a fun time.. whoa. It will all have to be blogged about later.

I shaved my head today.

Day 26- 100 day challenge

Hi. I missed yesterday. I had good reason to, but I suppose now I should fill you in.

On a quick side note.. I continue to avoid all flours, dairy and sugars successfully. It hasn't been easy when breakfast consists of giant croissants, donuts and muffins. But it's been done.

Last night, Seattle, was one of the most exciting nights of my life. It was extrodanairily cathartic and equally overwhelming.

Patti Smith was speaking on her new book, Just Kids. It happened to be only 3 blocks away. Due to the passionate adoration of her from my friend Vince, naturally I had to go. She was stunning and funny and so so lovely. Reading of running away to New York, living in the Chelsea and meeting Robert Mapplethorpe. Answeing questions, and singing solo with a guitar. She was heartwarming, self depreceating, and she filled my heart with explosions. I was completely besotted.

The end of the night, she sang Because the Night a cappella and had us all singing along and the words that I didn't know I knew flowed out of me in the pitch of the crowd. My explosions kicked the tears from my throat and into my eyes. I left that night and as soon as I could phoned Vince in tears at how beautiful it was. How much I wanted him to be there and how I could fully understand how he has been in love with her since forever.



This morning, and confirming my sneaking suspicions that I knew all along- she was sitting in the lobby of my hotel only a few feet from me. My heart jumped and fired a beat that has yet to cease. I calming walked away and then ran to my room for the book in hopes of getting one page signed. Pg 56. Because Vince had asked. She was gone by the time I got back. Silly. I should have just walked to the front desk and got a pen and paper. But that's the way the cookie crumbles.

So, there you go. It was an incredible night. It all hasn't made sense to me. There were other things that happened, but you know.. what happens in Seattle stays in Seattle.

Day 24- 100 day challenge

IMGP0041, originally uploaded by jilly71.

I went to the Tacoma Museum of Glass today. It's about a 45 minute drive from Seattle. I wouldn't say it's a museum though. It's more of a gallery. There's a hot shop where they are blowing glass live all day. It was, really kind of the best part. The other best part was the exhibit where they had taken children's drawings made into glass sculptures. Pure folly and whimsy and playful. The website for the museum has a bit of info and some of the pieces.. but they were so great. Smaller versions were for sale but sooooo expensive! What a wonderful thing for kids to see their refridgerator drawings turned into full on glass sculptures!

I was a bit disappointed there wasn't more info along the lines of the history of glass blowing or glass making. Like, when did glass first appear on the art scene in history. That's why I wouldn't call it a museum.

I did buy a souvenier though.. a glass baby head drinking glass. I LOVE IT. (and I went to a cafe that had all these Etch-A-Sketch's and the owner came by and showed us what someone left behind that was freaking amazing.)

See more photos here

Hair: 1 minute

the rendevous

IMGP0019, originally uploaded by jilly71.

Day 23- 100 day challenge

I think my metabolism has changed while I have forced myself to eat foods that are easier to convert to energy. Or the crashing from a diet with sugar and dairy dragged me down so much that now my body is in a full on reward cycle. A few weeks ago I was blabbing about a size 29 Levis. Well. they got kind of baggy. Yesterday I went back to the same store and bought the same pair in a size 27. Ok. Like I was a size 25 when I was 20 and a size 30 ever since I was 30. So.. I'm pretty much never eating sugar again. Just saying. Size 27? Seriously, I feel like I'm in a twilight zone.


Had a very bad time with my hair though. Shame. Must get back to reporting on it.

Day 22- 100 day challenge

A return to the challenge of blogging everyday. I still feel sick. I'm still a size 29 but I have a sneaking suspicion I may be a size 28.

My train trip to Seattle has been bumped in favor of being a special driver for two very important people.

I leave tonight after work. Busy busy busy..

did I miss a day?

I must have. Life goes on. Let's take a break and listen to one of the most beautiful creatures I have ever known. I met Bill when I was 17 and hitchhiking out of the South Country Fair. Back then he was a farmer near Innisfail. He gave me a ride to Red Deer. He looked at me, at my sweet 17, and told me I was bodacious or something and we've been stealing glances at one another ever since.  I run into him every 5 years or so like a guardian angel.

Day 18- 100 day challenge

Today I resisted cupcakes and chocolate cookies. Salt & Vinegar potato chips are my rescue.

Funny thing this morning.. I fell asleep with my takeout of wasabi edamame salad nearby (its really good..with rice and corn and red pepper.. I've recently discovered wasabi dried peas. OMG) and the smell of wasabi on my dreaming brain smelled like faint smoke coming through the heating vents and I awoke thinking the house was on fire. It wasn't. It was the wasabi.

Day 17- 100 day challenge

Today I pooled some Christmas money and collectively my parents bought me something that will last forever. I like to say this because they think I'm talking about a tattoo. But there is one other thing that will last forever.. Tiffany's.

I bought a "crown key" today. Thanks Mom. Thanks Dad. It goes well with the heart shaped one that Michael bought me. I'm sure I'll have them both forever.

Speaking of forever, I also had 3 little rosebuds tattooed today. I swear I used my own money.

Day 16- 100 day challenge

Jane- you're right. No extension. I could end up extending endlessly to make up for transgressions. Penance: $5 to the panhandler.

I'm off on a Candida Cleanse for another 14 days. Same thing/ diet as I'm doing now but I'll take supplements to eliminate Candida and restore healthy flora.

Today I candled my ears. You take these long hollow 'candles' of muslin dipped in beeswax and light one end and stick the tapered end in your ear. The candle make a vacumn as it burns pulling ear wax out. At the end you can cut open the candle to see what treasures lie within. It was gross. I won't elaborate but I think I can hear you better.

I wrapped up 54 Furoshiki packages today and delievered them to the hotel for 54 surprises and the weather was beautiful and warm.

The tiny bell whispered midnight midnight and she bundled herself against the bed springs that looked like the insides of a watch.

 

I wrote that.

Day 15- 100 day challenge

I ate chocolate today. Not very much. But I did. I broke the cleanse for the 2nd time. Bad bad me. A stringent diet is in place for an additional 10 days. April 20th is the conclusion.

An old friend sent me his very brilliant and inspiring book. I'll write more about it later.

Photographs I took will be in 150 shops around North America starting tomorrow. I think its kind of neat.

I bought 55 Vintage scarves today to make furoshiki wrapped welcome packs.  I don't really talk about my job, but sometimes I get to do some fun things.

Day 14- 100 day challenge

I bought a new Ipod Nano 16GB with video camera today. It's green and I chose the free engraving option.."It must be Jilly cuz jam don't shake that way."

That's an old thing from the days when I danced away the blues at the Commie. A friend of mine, Brother Ray, used to sing this song called Country Girl. He subbed my name into that lyric and every time he did it my heart soared it made me feel so special.

I'm rediscovering music. I need more of it. I need to go out and see more of it. And especially for my upcoming train trip. I'm off to Seattle for work near the end of the month. Lucky for me the Amtrak is actually running from Vancouver. Fun. And staying at the W hotel.

The cleanse ended.. the restrictions on flours, dairy and sugar continues.

Day 13- 100 day challenge

I found some.. ok wait.. really, I've been eyeing the container of sour cream in my fridge. Pretty bad to have it there in the 1st place when I'm flour/dairy/sugar free. Today it got the better of me. Scrambled eggs and organic turkey sausages. And a dollop of sour cream.

Penance- spilling it all over the carpet.

Day 12- 100 day challenge

Nothing is challenging today. I'm just grateful.

I'm grateful the lights are on.
I'm grateful I'm not hungry.
I'm grateful I can run a hot bath.
I'm grateful I can walk out doors and be in a park in the next minute
I'm grateful I have warm blankets when the weather turns cold.
I'm grateful I have a job that brings me challenges and happiness and a sense of purpose.
I'm grateful my my mother is beautiful and smart and I inherited some of her genes
I'm grateful my father is creative and intelligent and I inherited some of his genes.
I'm grateful my parents straightened my crooked teeth.
I'm grateful I have unusual, inspiring friends.
I'm grateful I've never been horribly hurt either physically or emotionally.
I'm grateful I have been hurt emotionally and physically. It reminds me that I am grateful for my health.
I'm grateful my family is safe and healthy.
I'm grateful I live in Canada.
I'm grateful I'm not buried under rubble in the dark like so many in Haiti tonight.
I'm grateful I am alive.

Day 11- 100 day challenge

Day 11 of the cleanse.

It's raining daily, and I'm just starting to feel rid of the flu. No bike riding yet. I went shopping last night and tried to find the allusive pair of jeans. I pulled a size 33- the usual since the last time I tried on jeans and they were massive. I kept trying on jeans until I realized I know fit into a size 29 Levi. That hasn't happened since my early 30's. Things are looking up.

I had a tarot reading that told me good things were coming.. I have to remove a few things before they can come along though. And all the answers I'm searching for are within me. I hate that. Honestly, I wish someone would tell me what to do, sometimes.

Oh yeah.. I bought a pair of grey cashmere cocktail gloves. I love grey cashmere. 

Day 10- 100 day challenge

Day 9- 100 day challenge

I went to go see Petunia and the Vipers last night at a nearby pub last night. Rockahillbilly is one way to describe them. The first time I heard them was down on Granville Island busking and I was entranced. So, I check out the gigs now and then. And, I guess I feel into old habits because I ended up having a pint of cider and a shot and never realized the sugar content. Whoops. 9 days penance for me. It's April 19th now.

Trich: 5 minutes. Not a good day. Not a bad day. Just not great.

Day 8- 100 day challenge

My year in review based on blog posts. It's been a frivolous year of traveling (wait.. travel is never frivolous- you're right Heidi) . There wasn't much else recorded.. that's all.


Jan
Almost took glass blowing classes but then didn't.

Feb
Discovered Buddha Hands


March
Went shooting photos with my great cousin
Cooked Cuban
Went to Seattle with my mom and sister
Saw Big Brother & the Holding Co in concert

April
Booked a ticket to Cuba
Went to the Skagit County Tulip Festival with my sister
Discovered Edison, Wa
Spent a day in Toronto

May
Walked in the Worker's Rally, Havana
Travelled acros Cuba and back again
Had a mini road trip to Victoria

June
Started a 100 day cleanse to eliminate sugar, flour, dairy

July
Went to Winnipeg Manitoba in search of dear old friends
Took a bunch of photos
Discovered Saskatoon perogies with cream gravy
wrote a poem
started making lanterns
planned another trip
Tried to sell lanterns in the rain
went on a juice cleanse

August
Went to Alberta and saw family
Had my forearms tattooed
Went to Nanaimo to see my old friend Bob

September
Went back to Manitoba
Had a 1000th post
locked myself out
dressed up as goose that laid golden eggs

October
reviewed my list of 100 things to do

November
Blogged every day for NaBloPoMo
decided on color in my tattoos
Sesame St turned 40
Slickety Jim's burnt down
I made a lot of lists
it rained alot and there was a flood warning
went to Bowen Island for the day
HINI was all over the news

December
nearly finished my tattoos
made prints for Christmas presents
Went home to Alberta
saw my friend Bill and got sad that I'd spent so many years out of touch
wrote a poem
Got really sick

Day 7- 100 day challenge

When in doubt use what you have

brown chicken breast
search for some sort of casserole dish with lid
chop onions
chop potatoes
cut up a carrot or 2
line bottom of casserole dish with onions/ potatoes
season chicken breast with salt/ pepper
add chopped garlic to casserole dish
chop up 1/2 yam left over from soup, toss in with potatoes/ onion
put chicken breast on bed of veggies
rinse a can of chickpeas and add
add a can of stewed romas tomatoes
cut up any big chunks of tomatoe
season with basil, salt/ pepper
cover and bake @400'C or until carrots are soft

Tada. No flour, dairy or sugar.

Trich: 1 minute.

Day 6- 100 day challenge

Today is the 4 yr anniversary of my blog. In 4 years I've posted 1055 posts. It's an uncountable number or words, paragraphs, poems ( well maybe 4 or 5), pictures, and other emphemera.

But there you have it. 4 years of my life documented. Here's this post that started it all...

Day 5- 100 day challenge

I've bored myself to death with writing about what food I'm eating. So no more. I'll just talk about my moods for the next 95 days.

For a week of so I've been having existential angst that I've wrecked my life. Silly, I'm sure, that seems. I don't know what to say except I've been waking up in panic and states of disbelief and disconnection. I don't know what to do.

Is it the sugar leaving my body?

Um.. 10 hrs later I'm swinging from a rainbow and I think I have the world on a string. WTF

Day 4- 100 day challenge

Countdown to April 10

Isn't it a bit boring, really, to hear what I've digested in a day? I mean, no one cares what you had for lunch. But then again, my blog isn't exactly charging the way of readership.

Breaky:
2 cups porridge, almond milk, almonds, dates, oranges
1 cup of coffee, 1 glass of water
Trich: 0

1 phone relocated.
1 taxi to work
It's raining.

1 new wool sweater in use.

to be continued...

soup..
I know this butcher place down on Granville Island that cut up the bacon slab ends and vacumn pack them into little balls of bacon bits. You can get a pack for about $5. Take that and stir fry in a little oil, onion, garlic at the bottom of a soup pot.

Add potatoes, carrots, yams, celery, red pepper
Salt & Pepper, tarragon or basil

Shzamm. Bacon & Potato soup.

Dinner.

I feel dark and unworthy. Needy. Greedy and sullen, tonight. It must be the sugar coming out. Or the sick.

Trich- 45 sec

Day 3- 100 day challenge

Due date: 10 April 2010

I was supposed to go to East is East on Broadway to meet up with a friend but instead I went to East is East on Main St. Bugger. One new year resolution is to have  a bigger group of friends and one that resides outside of work. I've been in a terrible rut of having my social life filled in by work and then not really maintaining any friendships outside of it. Tres bad. So, I had an invite today to meet with a friend and her friends and well.. how can you say no. But I got lost along the way and ended up at Locus on main St for breaky.

I phoned a dear friend of mine and we met up at Granville Island, one of my favorite places to be in the whole of Vancouver. A foodie wonderland. She introduced me to a girl who's right eye is blotched with brown, like mine. (my eyes are blue except for a brown splotch in one). If you have one, you often immediately spot one. I've met only a handful of people who share the characteristic. We thought maybe we should start a facebook group in hopes we'd find more people and then have a conference about recessive eye color genes and their fight to represent.

Sonia and I went downtown and 2 fortuitous events occurred.

1- I found a sweater I really wanted in Red Deer but that Gap didn't have my size. I found it in the Gap in Vancouver!

2- I left my phone behind in a bathroom. Not sure if this is fortuitous or not. But it's an event. Bugger.

So, my day started with one friend and ended with another. Thank god I'm up and about and not pining over gorgeous older men.

Sorry, I know its probably dreadfully boring, but Iam challenging myself to eat better and leave my hair alone..If I write it down publically everyday, I'm less likely to mess up. Especially with the trich. Come on root for me.

Lunch:
3 eggs scrambled
roasted potatoes
fruit- watermelon, canteloupe, honeydew, orange
2 cups coffee
2 glasses water
Dinner:
Large salad- greens, carrots, beets, almonds, sunflower seeds, cucumber dressed with oil/ vinegar
2 glasses of water
2 cups of tea

trich- 0 minutes

 

Day 2- 100 day challenge

Due date: 10 April 2010

It's not easy to eliminate all flours, sugars and dairy immediately. You have to read everything that is in a package. Why is cane sugar in everything? Sigh.

Today has not been a big food day. I better get better or I will alarm my mother

2 eggs scrambled, roasted potatoes, beans
2 cups of chamomile tea
2 glasses of water
3 oranges
1/2 apple
a handful of almonds
small bag of popcorn
bowl of tomatoe soup
Trich- 30 seconds

Over the years, I definitely see a pattern of becoming preoccupied with the attention of certain men. I could list them, but lets not go there. But what I can list is that they have all been creative, aloof, independent, good looking, great kissers. And I become so preoccupied that I begin to obsess over my own shortfalls and insecurities. Why? Oddly, the same qualities I describe these men are qualities I also have. I think it's some kind of break in my psyche that has become disconnected from my inner male, so when I meet these men that resonate with this piece of me, I cling to them in some way of feeling complete?? But how did the break happen in the first place?

I usually attribute all my problems with intimacy/ men to the death of my grandfather when I was 5. My grandfather adored me and I adored him. He would wait on the porch step for me and gleem in delight when I ran down the path. Pure joy. It was pure joy for him to see me and I knew it. I doubt I was able to process his death properly at 5. When I think of these men that I become so strongly attracted to, I have wanted all of them to adore me and hold me and protect me, like my grandfather. They've all had this feeling to me that I could fall into their eyes and arms and somehow magically everything would be alright.

Naturally, this isn't possible. These men are not my grandfather. I don't think my grandfather was particularly aloof, but maybe he appeared that out of reach for my 5 yr old mind. I don't know really what it is, I just see a pattern and it bothers me. It's happened again and I'm preoccupied and anxious and trying to make sure they keep paying attention to me. Really, I need to pay attention to myself and fill my own needs and be deliciously thrilled to see me.

Know what I mean? Sometimes you just need to talk about it a bit too. It's a bit silly, but the feelings are really powerful and I don't really understand why. By the way, Clint Eastwood could be one of these magical men. Its a combination of the blue eyes, creative spirit, working hands, and a smell of dust and tobacco. If you're prone to jeans and t shirts, I could fall in love with you.

It's a new year.

It's Jan 1. It's a time for rituals, reflections, and resolutions. Some people reflect on the year and set goals for the new one. Some cleanse themselves of past transgressions. Some part take in the ritual of the annual Vancouver Polar Bear Swim at English Bay. And some get dressed up in hot pink bikini bottoms and encase themselves in a giant bubble.

Onwards and upwards 2010. It's going to be an interesting year.

Day 1- 100 day challenge

Due date: 10 April 2010

I've challenge my self starting Jan 1, to eliminate sugars, flours and dairy products from my diet. By default, that leaves me with whole grains, nuts, beans, vegetables, fruits, meat, poultry, fish and water.And too blog everyday about it.

Today I started the Wild Rose Cleanse. It helps get you on the good food and off the bad.

Off to English Bay to photograph the Polar Bear Swim

Breakfast- large bowl of mixed greens, a few dates, half an apple dressed with oil, vinegar and 1/4 white onion. 2 glasses of water.

Dinner- small salad; dressed with lemon juice & oil. Organic meat patty; no bun, side order of fries, black coffee, water

auld lang syne

The new year rose unfolds. I always find the ends of cycles to be auspicious. The beginning of weeks, months, years, birthdays all seem to hold a stronger spark of opportunity for a fresh start for me. I'm bound in some way by cycles, feeling at times that something must run its course, or that I'm compelled and held in a loop.

I don't have very many resolves for the new year, but only a few:

To live a more honest life with trichotillomania and be held back by it less. It's a course that's been running in my life for a long time and I've been terribly disappointed when a new cycle starts and it tags along into the new years, new birthdays. I vow to love it like a funny child that needs to hold my hand and less like a heavy weight on my heart.

To enrich my diet with fresh fruits, vegetables, whole grains/ beans, organic and ethical meats, and plenty of loved water. To eliminate dairy, flours, and sugars (except for the odd teaspoon of Cuban honey)

To display my creativity more often. To have a show of my photography.

To live a more balanced and enriched life with work, exercise, and fun.

To give more love, kindness, support and patience to people.

To dance more often.

To be Jill.

for you B, sweet friend

Seasons cold that push the frost
hiding from the clock time ticking.
The chickadee cries wait wait..
she's still playing in the tall wheat grass picking.

For the peek a boo of lovers,
waiting for breeze the summer warms.
Electricity comes on the coattails of the sparrow
when the nighttime turns to darkened storms.

Sun beams through the old farm windows
your gaze peeking through the seasons of my life.
The hide and seek of friendship,
cut up for children, a cake with a golden knife

One day she will take that lovely creature
wrap them up with feathers from her nest
and play the tiny birdsong of words
where her eyes speak and the heart knows the rest

the trapeze act

I'm going back to school. I think. First stop.. my GED. Next stop Biology 12. I'm going to try and open a few doors and windows.

Then I'll jump through some hoops, do a few summersaults and jumping jack or two and feel less like a caged monkey and on my way to ringleader extrodanaire.

Life is a god damn circus, doncha know.

Maybe I'll blog about being a shiftless 37 year old who starts to walk down the yellow brick road, get famous. It'll all be turned into a movie and Natalie Portman will play me.

I watched Julie & Julia tonight. It was good and I enjoyed it. But I enjoyed it less for the entertainment of it and more for the parallel I felt towards it. Julia Child was 37 and hadn't found a career and didn't know what to do with herself. Ok, she was also married, had come from a family with money and was living in Paris with her diplomat husband.

The fact is she was unfocused and untrained at 37. Much like me.

Julie was in a dead end secretarial job, living with her husband and a cat when she started a blog on cooking her way through Julia Child's - Mastering the Art of French Cooking. Inadvertantly rescuing her from a drowning feeling and inertia of going nowhere.

I live with my boyfriend and a cat and have a sinking feeling in my stomach that if I don't do something about my sinking feeling it might get worse.

I don't think I'm going to cook my way through a book or run off to Paris, but I sure which I knew what was going to do.

in honor of my mother

Because I know that she'd rather I hadn't colored all over my arms, but she still makes lovely and supportive comments and says the work is pretty. By the way, thanks for letting me draw all over my bedroom walls in black permanent marker. No matter how many coats of paint, you could still read the lyrics to a Beatles song. I only wish we'd taken photos of that.

One of my favorite recipes from my mom.. its dinner tonight. Looking forward to seeing you in 15 days.

Smothered Chicken

4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
1 tsp salt
1 tsp coarsely ground black pepper
1 tbsp vegetable oil
2 cups diagonally sliced carrots
1 cup sliced onion
1 garlic clove, minced
2 (8 once) packages pre=sliced mushrooms- I ignore this.
1/4 cup all purpose flour
1 14.5 ounce can fat free chicken broth
1 tbsp chopped fresh or 1 tsp dried thyme
Chopped fresh chives (optional)

Brown chicken in a skillet over medium heat. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Remove.

Heat oil in pan; add carrots, onion, and garlic. Cook 2 minutes. Add mushrooms; cook 5 minutes until vegetables are tender. Sprinkle with flour; cook 2 minutes, stirring constantly.

Add broth and thyme, bring to a boil and cook until slightly thickened. Return chicken to the pan. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 10 minutes until chicken is done. Garnish with chives if desired.

Yield 4 servings.

Note: I put in a slow over (280 – 300) and cook for 2-3 several hours like a stew. Often add more broth to make sure I have lots of gravy and serve with mashed potatoes.

little birds

IMGP5068, originally uploaded by jilly71.

See a whole bunch more here..

ooohhhhh oooohhh you look like a little monkey

NaBloPoMo #30

Sure, I think I cheated once or 3 times and post dated my posts, but who's watching? Just my mother, my aunt, my sister and my cousin.

Seriously.. doesn't anybody else read my blog???

NaBloPoMo #30

The first 3 people who leave a comment identifying themselves as a regular reader of MKP will get something special from me.

NaBloPoMo #29

I really like Pomegranate's. Especially now, when they're in season. You can get ones that are as big as a baby's head at Granville Island.

Here's a few funny facts:

- Native of Iran, immigrated to California in 1769
-grown on a rounded shrub or tree, typically 12 ft
-varieties can live as long as 200 yrs, but tend to be a bit bunk on production after 15
-seeds in guacamole are exceptionally a good idea but there are a zillion things to do with them
-high in Vit C, potassium
-some scholars put the pomegranate in the Garden of Eden instead of the apple. (But then you'd have to believe in the creationist theory. I'm an evolutionist.)
- The Q'Uarn lists the pomegranate the fruit that grows in the the Garden of Paradise.
-it's easier to get the seeds if you peel them under water, but not nearly as much fun
-the juice will permanently stain a white tshirt. Tested and true
-Cleopatra used the seeds for lipstick- apparently and ancient Egyptians were buried with them
-there are 760 varieties

NaBloPoMo #28

colored in, originally uploaded by jilly71.

NaBloPoMo #27

The H1N1 is a controversial topic, isn't it. Now that I have achey bones, a sore throat and a head that feels like a cast iron balloon I'm getting the "are you gonna get it" question.

I have to say that the answer is no. And I'm going to put up a few videos and links because I'm really not feeling well and would rather be back on the couch with some HaggenDaz and the remote control.

There's this one that talks about the controversy behind the immunizations for the "Swine Flu Epidemic of 1976"

Swine Flu 1976 & Propaganda
Uploaded by Dianequiose-4. - See video of the biggest web video personalities.

Then there's this more recent one of a cheerleader (isn't it always them?) who got the immunization and had a severe neurological disorder that caused her to loose her ability to walk and talk unless she was moving backwards. Kind of sounds like something out of a science fiction horror movie.


Moving on, there's the fact that a Baxter- a major drug company, applied for the patent on the immunization 10 months before the news broke about Swine Flu. Call me crazy, but that's crazy.

See the patent application here..

I wonder how their stock is doing..

I read this here:

"Companies working on swine flu vaccines include Sanofi- Aventis SA, based in Paris, GlaxoSmithKline Plc and AstraZeneca Plc, both based in London, CSL Ltd. of Melbourne and Novartis AG, based in Basel, Switzerland. And of course, Baxter International Inc. , based in Deerfield, Illinois, has contracts with five countries for 80 million doses and has stopped taking new orders that it may not be able to fill….The swine flu pandemic will be a boon to the company this year and mutations in H1N1 and other strains may create a lasting new business for the company"

Really, a boon you say? Sounds like 'good business'. And then this..

"Baxter’s stock is performing well even though ,”Baxter sent vaccines contaminated with deadly live H5N1 avian flu virus to 18 countries before someone caught the mistake and the vaccine got injected thousands of people. Baxter just missed creating its own pandemic then by mixing deadly H5N1 virus with a mix of H3N2 seasonal flu viruses, or did they? By possibly creating the pandemic, maybe Baxter already has the cure and that is why WHO has deemed them the appropriate pharmaceutical company to lead the way for a swine flu vaccine. Keep in mind- Just 50 miles from the H1N1 ground zero outbreak in Mexico City, lies Baxter’s manufacturing plant in Cuernavaca, Mexico."


I think you get my point. I think I'm only left to follow the good advice of my mother.. get alot of rest and eat your fruits and veggies..and maybe this..

NaBloPoMo #25

I live with a cat named Ruby and a relocated Brit named Michael. Michael and Ruby have a special bond. I think they have a past life connection. Ruby will be all "whatever" and Michael comes home and she's perky and races around, running over to him and will stand there with a wistful look in her eye. Then, she'll lift one paw up and mew gently as if to say, "hello lover, pet me." It's kind of weird, really. She does it alot so its no coincidence. The cat really does have a fondness for Michael.

So, Michael has this theory about Ruby- that she thinks we can control everything. We turn off the lights, we open the door, we leave for long periods of time and its dark and then we come back and its light again. We are the gods of her world. With the 3 possible exists to the apartment, he's convinced that it is a different reality for each one for her. The fact that we can provide access to these portals enhances our god like existence in her life.

So, he believes that Ruby thinks that we are in charge of what he calls the rain machine. When it rains, Ruby goes to her kitty door ( the one she can control to gain access to the outside world), comes back, looks at Michael and goes back to the door and does this repeatedly. He thinks it's Ruby's way of saying, "please turn off the rain."

It's kind of funny. Poor kitty.

pink nose, originally uploaded by jilly71.

NaBloPoMo #24

I'm back to writing lists...

10 places I would like to live

1. House boat
2. House boat in Amsterdam
3. Paris but only in Montparnasse and only with shuttered windows and red begonias.
4. Edinburgh but only with a mountain of sweaters and a sunny disposition.
5. Hostel anywhere in the world as long as I owned it
6. The Farm
7. The Chelsea Hotel
8. one of those really cute one bdrm houses in the river valley of Edmonton
9. Havana but only if I could speak Spanish.
10. Here.. (Rue due Lac no.6, Brussels. Built in 1904 by architect Ernest Delune. The stylized facade is one of the most original examples of Art Nouveau in Brussels.)

NaBloPoMo #23

My mother is going to Cuba. Albeit, she's going to Varadero and staying in a resort, and that's as far away from Cuba in Cuba as you can get, but at least she'll be on the island. Rumor has it she'll leave her compound of all things familiar in North America and venture to Havana. She'll wish she got off the white sand beach, tourquise waters, toilet paper and swan towel sculptures sooner for the old cars, crumbling architecture, street artists, wafting Spanish guitars from parks and plazas and sad but calm resolve of Fidel's Havana.

I've asked her to bring me back my treasured Cuban Honey.

NaBloPoMo #22

All these years I thought I had Shepard's Pie in the bag. I'd made it so many times before, it was a no brainer. So, I tell the boyfriend, that's what I'm making for dinner and he just about falls out of his chair. I'm going to cook lamb? He thinks incredulously. Ya, that would be incredible. But I say, no of course not. Then he's all like.. well you're making cottage pie not Shepard's Pie and then and politely, with accent, explains the difference.. Did you really think Shepard's Pie didn't include the flock of the Shepard? Um no, I guess not. Why the hell do they call it Cottage Pie then? I guess it refers to the scraps in the house.

Oh well.

Brown a 1/b of lean ground beef. I buy ground beef only from a butcher. I don't trust grinding facilities in Safeway or any other major grocery store and neither should you.

Add 2-3 carrots, and an onion chopped

Brown for 5 minutes or until meat is no longer pink

Add 1tbsp flour, 1tsp allspice and 1tbsp mixed dry herbs (thyme, basil, marjoram, etc..)

Mix 1 1/2 cups beef broth with 1tbsp tomato paste, add to beef and simmer until fluid almost absorbed.

Meanwhile.. boil potatoes, drain and mash with butter & milk

Spoon meat into casserole dish, add a can of corn, top with mashed potatoes. Sprinkle with a bit of cheddar cheese.

Bake in 350'F oven for 30 minutes or until the boyfriend comes home.

NaBloPoMo #21

Today I went to Bowen Island on the water taxi from Granville Island. It's a $25 return trip. Quaint. The boat trip was the best bit. It was kind of a covered speed boat that bounced and swerved through the choppy water, swerving to miss the logs. Through False Creek, under the Burrard bridge and up along West Van, around the corner from Lighthouse Park and we were on Bowen.

There wasn't too much to see without quite a hike up the hill. A few shops, a soap seller, an antique shop, a bakery and a restaurant or 2. I wandered around, chatted with people and bought some soap and a handknit hat.

It rained and was cold. I left early. Pictures later.

NaBloPoMo #21

Today I went to Bowen Island on the water taxi from Granville Island. It's a $25 return trip. Quaint. The boat trip was the best bit. It was kind of a covered speed boat that bounced and swerved through the choppy water, swerving to miss the logs. Through False Creek, under the Burrard bridge and up along West Van, around the corner from Lighthouse Park and we were on Bowen.

There wasn't too much to see without quite a hike up the hill. A few shops, a soap seller, an antique shop, a bakery and a restaurant or 2. I wandered around, chatted with people and bought some soap and a handknit hat.

It rained and was cold. I left early. Pictures later.

NaBloPoMo #20

don't toy with me, originally uploaded by jilly71.

NaBloPoMo #19

20 bath items in my bathroom...all from Lush.. (if you know me you know why)

1. Aura Suavis Shower Gel 2 bottles
2. Olive Branch Shower Gel
3. Be Never to Busy to be Beautiful Shower Gel
4. Prince Shaving Cream
5. Razorantium Shaving Cream
6. Karma Shower Gel
7. Jasmin & Henna Fluff Eaze
8. Butterball Showe Gel
9. Rehab Shampoo
10. Dr. Peppermint Shampoo Bar
11. Karma Soap
12. Demon in the Dark Soap
13. Gentil Lentil Solid Conditioner
14. Star Melt Bath melt
15. So White Bath Bomb
16. Big Blue Bath Bomb
17. Ego Massage Bar
18. Into Thin Air Massage bar
19. Sunny Citrus Soap
20. Schnuggle Body Butter

NaBloPoMo #18

ochre, originally uploaded by jilly71.

Did I mention it's raining. Let's put something sunny up.

NaBloPoMo #17

10 books on my bookshelf in no particular order and a bit on how I came to have the book...

1. Do It- Jerry Rubin- I used to babysit for a couple with 2 kids when I was in Grade 7 or 8. The man worked for the Edmonton Journal- they had been hippies in the 60's and I revelled in their record collection when left in their home. They had Do It on a book shelf and I vowed to have a copy one day. I was fascinated with the 60's for good chunk of my teen years.

2. The World Encyclopedia of Cheese- Juliet Harbutt- I worked in a deli with approx 300 variations of cheese. In the downtime, I read the background stories and around my late 20's was pretty interested in it. I still am when I'm within sight of a good cheese counter. I think they're the "brand new antique".

3. Strathcona Composite High School yearbook 1987-88- It's what you did. You got the yearbook and got it signed by your friends.

4. On Photography- Susan Sontag- I had a thing for a local photographer who once worked for National Geographic. I thought he was interesting. He had a yard sale and was selling the book. I bought it to impress him. I didn't.

5. Confederacy of the Dunces- John Kennedy O'Toole- I was tricked out on New Orleans for a while and wanted to go to the Jazz and Heritage Festival (I've NEVER wanted to go to Mardi Gras). I used to talk to someone who worked in the Wee Book Inn in Edmonton who told me if I liked New Orleans, I should read this book. When I did go, I had to get a photograph of a Lucky Dog vendor. Read the book.

6. Janson History of Art- 5th edition- One of the only subjects I've ever enjoyed studying. I've lugged this 20 lb bible around for nearly 15 years.

7. Tachen- Art Nouveau- I love Art Nouveau. I've stomped all over Brussels, Paris and Prague in search of it. My boyfriend bought me this one Christmas.

8. The Bodacious Book of Succulence- Sark- It was a gift from my sister. I look at it every now and then. It's uplifting and Sark is a genius.

9. Weegee's World- Miles Barch- Year ago, I spent a bunch of lonely nights looking up master photographers and found the work of Weegee. I was in NYC and looking through all the gallery listings and there was a rogue gallery tucked away in a tiny basement showing original photos. Weegee is great- He was a crime scene photographer in NY in the 30's. He got his name for being the 1st one on the scene, but really he had a police radio in his car. His photos are of the off to the side scene often overlooked by usual eye, but overshadowing the crime scene he snapped. Brilliant brilliant stuff. He was a voyeur and preceded Diane Arbus. I shat my pants when I saw this book for sale in a record shop in Toronto.

10. The Poetry of Cats- various- Inscribe by my mom on 04 Sept 1990

NaBloPoMo #16

There's a flood warning for the lower mainland. I rode my bike through a puddle that turned out to be a small pond, 2 feet deep and over my pedals. It rained all day Friday, all day Saturday and Sunday. I don't think it's stopped raining today. Yup, it's still raining.

But I vow to not be a fair weather rider this week. It's a 30 minute soaking wet trek to work each way. But it's always better than standing at a bus stop and then standing on a sweaty, stinky bus full of H1N1.

Today when I got home I discovered the following thought rolling over me...

I may procrastinate about getting up the hills, I never regret doing it, but I always regret not riding.

Onwards and upwards has such an ironic ring to it.

If I ride each way this week, I will ride 100k by the end of the week.

The reward? I'll ride my bike to Granville Island on the weekend and put my bike on the water taxi to Bowen Island and spend the night in a B&B. Ideally one with a big bathtub.

NaBloPoMo #15

Tea for you and tea for me..Today I'm make bread, you'll see...

Honey Tea Bread.

A copy and paste from the website...

* 225g (8oz) raisins
* 75g (3oz) set honey
* 300ml (½pt) freshly made strong tea
* 2 eggs, size 3, lightly beaten
* 275g (10oz) whole-wheat flour
* 2.5ml (½tsp)ground mixed spice
* 15ml (1tbsp) baking powder

Place the raisins in a bowl. Stir the honey into the tea and pour this over raisins. Leave to soak for 2 hours. Stir the eggs into the raisin mixture.

Pre-heat oven to 180oC, 350oF, Gas Mark 4. Mix the flour with the spice and baking powder then mix these dry ingredients into the raisin mixture. Transfer to a greased 900g (2lb) loaf tin and bake for about 1 hour 10 minutes.
Cook on a wire rack and serve sliced and buttered.

Makes one 900g (2lb) loaf.

NaBloPoMo #14

roads less travelled, originally uploaded by jilly71.

NaBloPoMo #13

Bacon from the butcher- 7 or 8 slices
trim the white bit
chop up and fry in large soup pot with a bit of olive oil
chopped onion and garlic
s&p to taste
while frying, chop 2-3 carrots and add to soup pot
set heat on low and cover slightly
peel or scrub 4-5 small potatoes, 2-3 yams/ sweet potatoes
add a yellow beet for fun
1 red pepper chopped fine for color
add everything to pot and cover with water
add a teaspoon of 'better than bouillon'
bring to a boil
add 1/2 cup of cream
simmer
add dash of dried tarragon
enjoy

cool left overs overnight and skim off cooled oils
roast corn niblets in a dash of nutmeg and butter and add.


Creamed potato and bacon becomes bacon corn chowder.

NaBloPoMo #12

One of my favorite restaurants burned down this morning.

A fire is said to have started in the Sushi restaurant next door.

Slickety Jim's was not your everyday diner. It was special. It was decorated with bric-brac that looked like it was looted from the antique store, yard sale and your grandmother's attic. But the menu had the real decoration.

I liked to go there just so I could say, Society Made me What I am- and that meant I'd have the scrambled eggs, vegan sausage and cheese wrapped in a tortilla with salad on the side.

RIP Slick. I'll miss you.

NaBloPoMo #11

What I remember..

• We had shag carpet or some kind of texture-y carpet. I think it was beige..or off white.
  

• The cat was fat and a regular tabby kind of cat. Her name was Duchess. I have no memories of enjoying this cat, which I find odd.
  

• My parents were big fans of teak furniture, but you know it was the 70's. (on a side note: there a shop in my neighbourhood that sells vintage furniture and has a whole room dedicated to the Danish 70's groove. Once they had the couch from my childhood. I was mesmerized by it's incarnation in my life 30 yrs later and told them so. Every now and then I go in and remember the family living room.)

• I had a washed out acrylic/polyester nightgown with a faded floral pattern, elastic at the collar and sleeves that I suffered insufferable bouts of static cling in.
  

• I used to watch Sesame Street with my chin propped on my elbows- entranced. Somewhere nearby would likely be a bowl of corn flakes and milk or porridge.

• The kitchen had orange lino and the kitchen chairs were covered in vinyl that stuck to my legs on hot days. My mother would make me peanut butter and banana sandwiches and serve them on paper towel.
  

• My best friend lived next door. Her name was Tanya Barter and her parents were from Australia. Her father used to shovel the snow in his shorts. I remember sitting in their kitchen when Elvis died and not knowing who Elvis was. "Who shot JR" had a bigger impact in my life.
  

• Her younger brother was Trent and he once peed all over the front yard and sprayed the windows. It's my 1st known memory of seeing a penis.

• Once I bought "perfume" with my allowance from a kid who lived across the street. It was really rose petals and water in a jar. I think my mom found it in my closet and made me take it back.

• My father made fun of the decor of a house across the street. You could see in their house because they had a large front window. I think it was the wallpaper that pissed him off.
  

• The address was 77 Greystone Crescent and the phone number was 464-3182. I have no idea why I have retained that fact except I remembered it when I was a child when you needed to know how to dial 911 or tell someone you were in trouble and where you lived and how to get a hold of your parents.

• My bedroom had cold white/grey lino and I often ran from the light switch to the bed because there was something very very bad under the bed.
  

NaBloPoMo #10

It's the 40th anniversary of Sesame Street today.

Can you imagine that? Wow.

Everybody sing along...

Sunny Day
Sweepin' the clouds away
On my way to where the air is sweet

Can you tell me how to get,
How to get to Sesame Street

Come and play
Everything's A-OK
Friendly neighbors there
That's where we meet

Can you tell me how to get
How to get to Sesame Street

It's a magic carpet ride
Every door will open wide
To Happy people like you--
Happy people like
What a beautiful

Sunny Day
Sweepin' the clouds away
On my way to where the air is sweet

Can you tell me how to get,
How to get to Sesame street...
How to get to Sesame Street
How to get to...




This blog post has been brought to you by the letter J and and the number 1

NaBloPoMo #9

Whenever, I've been in Havana, the Prado on Saturdays is an absolute must. It's a "10-block-long, marble-balustraded, terrazzo-floored, shaded promenade with built in sit-walls that cascade down the central boulevard of Old Havana"* (I couldn't say it any better).

It has traffic on either side and a long boulevard for pedestrians. On Saturdays, local artists display their crafts or artwork. One of my last days in Havana, I met a young photographer named Brayan who really accomplished some amazing feats of photography- had a show in Havana that collaborated with a US photographer, was able to get large scale prints etc..

He continues to amaze me with his images and that he is able to get them online and email them to me. Today I got a link of a variety of images.. please go look. They're stunning, original and evoke the true beauty and grit of a city like Havana.

Here's the link to Brayan's images...

*quote from here (Check out the list of top 60 public spaces as well)

NaBloPoMo #8

10 places in Vancouver I really enjoy

1. Granville Island
2. Under my feather duvet
3. The SPCA
4. Water taxis in False Creek
5. Joe's Cafe on Commercial Drive
6. The Roundel on Hastings
7. Commercial Drive
8. Gastown
9. Trout Lake Park
10. West 4th in Kits

NaBloPoMo #7

For my special London friend...

Chipotle Mayo and Chips

Get some chipotle peppers. You can usually find these in most markets with a "latin food" section. Lucky for me, the peppers are in most markets in my neighborhood. They're most likely canned with adobe sauce which is generally tomatoes, spices and ancho peppers. They look like this..

Scoop some mayo into a bowl

Chop those Chipotle peppers up finely and blend with Mayo. Add some of that adobe sauce for good measure. Blend well or whiz with a hand blender until smooth.

Chippies...

Slice peeled potatoes really thinly on a mandoline. Fry in a bit of oil and drain on paper towels. Toss with a bit of salt to taste.

For a plateful of chips, you need 1 large baking potato, scrubbed clean. A bit of salt and pepper to taste and some oil. Using the wavy (crinkle) side of a mandoline, slice the potato once, then turn the potato 90 degrees horizontally and cut again. This criss-cross way of cutting results in hatched or meshed slices- so fun and fancy but go straight and easy too. Place the slices in a wee bit of oil and fry till brown or toss them in a bit of oil and bake till crispy. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.

Turn on the telly, cozy up under a blanket with something to drink.. chipotle peppers are smoky and spicy and dip your chippies.

sonicyouth

sonicyouth, originally uploaded by jilly71.

NaBloPoMo #6

Current state:

tattoo sore
laundry taking over
bathroom floor growing a mysterious substance
chips and chipotle mayo for dinner
dishes need doing
nothing in the fridge
raining
couch comfort overriding the bed
feeling sicky sicky

NaBloPoMo #5

birds of fancy, originally uploaded by jilly71.

Here's my fancy dancy little bird all colored in.

NaBloPoMo #4

There's a little bird that I've become kind of fond of. So fond, that I'll be looking at the lilac throated roller for a very long time.

Tomorrow, my little tattooed birds will be colored. I've never been one for colored tattoos but this little bird has won me over to the other side. My birds just wouldn't be the same without their little lilac breasts and tufts of turquoise and honey brown and brilliant prairie sky blues.



I'll post pictures later this week.

NaBloPoMo #3

10 non people things I don't like. Again, I'll try not to deviate to food.

1. snow
2. mushrooms
3. broken fingernails
4. mold in any form any where
5. angry dogs
6. the color orange
7. garbage strikes
8. red roses
9. Guinness
10. pens that don't work

NaBloPoMo #2

10 non people things I like. I'll try not to focus on food:

1. kittens
2. fresh baked bread
3. photography
4. gravy on mashed potatoes
5. fresh laundry
6. the smell of geraniums
7. sunny mornings
8. songs that sound like trains
9. feather duvets
10. ordering in

NaBloPoMo means I'm crazy

Otherwise stands for National Blog Posting Month. I think this will be my 3rd year in a row of this nonsense.

9 down. 91 to go.

It's been a year and a bit and I kind of forgot about my list of 100 things to do before I die. Reading over it again, it seems a bit wacky. There are some things that I'm all like wha?? Like for example:

# 3- ride a giraffe. Not likely, Jill.

#27- Bungee Jump- it looks good on a list of 100 things to do before you die but truth be told, I'm more likely to have my fingernails pulled out than jump off a bridge with a giant elastic band tied to my ankles.

How bout #52- dig up a time capsule- unless someone tells me where one's hidden or I plant my own, this kind of seems a bit unobtainable. Do you know where there's a time capsule I could dig up?

#79- Stop getting tattooed? Why would I put that on the list? It seems so unlikely to say no never again.

And #91- "This Bud's for You"? I think I may have managed to complete #58 without knowing it- make my own cheese.

But some things have, surprisingly, been completed.

#6- have a public exhibit of my photos. Not exactly what I had in mind when I wrote that, but I did rig up a laundry line and hang my photos on day on the street. I sold $30 worth of cards I'd made.

#16- Pay Someones rent for the month- I have paid my boyfriend's rent at least once. He's paid mine too. Works out well.

#17- Give someone a job- I hired a lovely girl named Jill. Seriously.

#24- Spend the night in the Chelsea Hotel- Spent 2 nights. Dreams don't come cheap at $300 US/night but it was glorious and magnificent and I don't regret one second of it. It was magical. I had a balcony apartment. I pretended I "lived" there for 48 hrs.

#30- Swim with Sharks- I'll change this to dolphins- so much gentler and less scary and check- done. (why do I want to scare myself needlessly to make my list more interesting??)

#45- Inspire someone- rumor has it this has happened.

#54- Visit Cuba before its too late- meaning before they announce Fidel is dead and open the floodgates of US travelers. It's never too late to visit Cuba. I've been there twice now for a total of 4 weeks. Amazing.

#57- See a ghost- well not exactly but I have seen something fly off a shelf unprovoked.

#80- Find the perfect pair of jeans- Levi 501, W33 L32, European cut- found the pair- and they're perfect. Will I find them again? Maybe not.

So.. one of these weekends I'll attempt #37 and not say a word and I better get crackin on #74- make all my Christmas Gifts.

a key to unlock the door

I especially like the new Tiffany Keys.

I'm saving all my quarters for a sparkly platinum one, but in the meantime my darling boyfriend whom I don't nearly appreciate enough sometimes bought me one just because it was a Saturday in October.

Now you know what's on my Christmas wishlist. Let's go in on one together.

mennonite dishes and wimpy burgers

Mennonite dishes, originally uploaded by jilly71.

speechless

"This was allegedly voted unanimously by staff at Maroochydore High School in Queensland for use on their telephone answering system. Very possibly fake, but very funny, Also has a serious point that perhaps parents and students should be more accountable and take more responsibility themselves instead of blaming the school for their failings."

they stayed at the drive in till everyone else had gone

they never left the drive in, originally uploaded by jilly71.

I probably didn't mention this tomfoolery either

Jiggerypokery as in like, Halloween isn't for 31 days, ya know. BUT- if you really want to know, I went to a costume ball in September and the theme was fairy tales. You know me, I'm the goose that laid the golden egg. By the way, those are giant bath bombs that reeked of lavender. I barely made it out of the event alive with my "Golden Eggs". Those of you who know me will know why.

maybe I didn;t mention it?

I had someone draw 2 very beautiful pictures on my forearms. Lucky for me and you we can look at them always and forever onwards.
I

a little story

So I stayed late to finish and finally decided to ride home- at about 11 pm. I know. It was a bad night to begin with. But I get home, have to pee madly and rummage around in my bike bags looking for the elusive keys to my apt. I give up when the pressure on my bladder is to much to bear and tear under the porch steps and drop'em.

The return to the search for the magical instrument that will allow me refuge in a warm apt remains unfulfilled. It begins to dawn on me that I don't have my keys. Oh well, at least the landlord is home. The lights upstairs are on and I sheepishly knock on the door. More than once. I knock again a little louder. No luck. The only thing now keeping me warm are the tears rolling down my face.

At this point, slight desperation sets in and I try every key I have in the faint hope one of them will work. Panic develops when I realize I may be outside for the night. I ponder my options and realize I have no idea where the closest hotel may be. Is it that run down hole on Kingsway? Do I go back to work? Knock on the neighbors? Go to a friend's? Who?

I walk around to the back door and encounter 3 raccoons fighting for the fat red grapes hanging off the mangled and tangled vine that snakes up the house. Last night's memory of coyotes in the front yard make for a night outside a little less appealing. I try one of the many useless keys and find I can get into the laundry room. Great. I have a tent and worst case, at least I have shelter and now.. tools.

My first attempt to readjust the security bars on my bedroom window proves to be fruitless when I discover I no longer have the hips of a 8 yr old. I try the bathroom window and take out the kitty screen. Yup. I still don't have the hips of a child. This isn't going to work. I'm wondering if anybody has noticed me walking around the house trying windows.

The raccoons are fighting and screeching for territory on the roof. Surely there can't possibly be anyone upstairs with all this racket. I go back to my bike and get my light off and go to the kitchen window. I knew you'd thrown my other set on the floor when you left. I had visions of finding them, finding a stick and somehow being able to cleverly catch them and reel the in like some kind of golden fish that would solve all my problems. I don't see them. Instead I see my apartment, the one that I'm not allowed in.

I get a bit desperate and figure if I can cut the lock that is securing my security grate over the open window, perhaps my 38 yr old hips will fit. What about my fat head though. I get some wire cutters to cut a lock. I'm grasping at chewed on straws, but sweet Jesus it works and the lock snaps. I swing the bar open and get a bench to stand on. With one foot in and then the other, I'm going in backwards and fully expect to knock every dish on the floor or get stuck and that I'm found in the early dawn by the coppers.

I'm able to slither through and land jubilantly in my apt to find that you put the keys down on the counter under the window- all within reaching distance the whole time. It was some kind of weird feeling that the entire time I panicked and cried and hand pangs of desperation, my little golden fish flopped into my boat and cocked it's stupid eye at me and said.. I told you so.

1000th post

I've been busy. I've been pondering and procrastinating on what exactly the 1000th post on More Kisses Please should say. I want it to be fabulous and witty, but did I mention I've been busy.

All I ever wanted to say is the world and me needs more kisses. It's really hard being alive and having feelings and reading about all the horrible things happening down the street and across the world. It's hard being a girl. I suppose its hard to be a boy too. We're all a bit backwards in our pursuits of luxury and possessions.

So, my friends.. tell people you love them. Hug them and tell them they're pretty and lovely. We all need to hear it and for heaven's sake, give more kisses please.

Love Jill.

when its safe to come out, I'll be back

IMGP4277, originally uploaded by jayewell.

Dirt River

Dirt River, originally uploaded by jayewell.

Personally, in a very heartfelt way- I sincerely believe this is the best photograph I have ever taken. Its a painting.

gmc, originally uploaded by jayewell.

I went all the way to Manitoba and all I got was 23 photos

I few weeks back, I went to Manitoba in search of my past. I didn't find it, but I did find 23 wonderful photos.

You can see the set here.

on a clear day I can see for miles

on a clear day I can see for miles, originally uploaded by jayewell.